Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Holding on, moving on

Saturday evening, as the sun was setting, I stood motionless staring into the empty lot behind our house. I could hear a variety of birds, a frog croaking, dozens of dogs barking, an airplane making its descent, traffic in the distant. The weather was perfect, the chores were done, and my kids were tucked in for the night.

All weekend long I had put off making a phone call to deliver some news to a dear friend, but now there was no answer and I was regretting not having called sooner.

I felt excited, thrilled really, and relieved in so many ways! Yet the sting of sadness and the anticipation of loss was equally present. A variety of emotion mixed together and neutralized for the weekend, leaving me to feel nothing. It was a rather bizarre state to be in as Sunday morning approached.

I have allowed nearly a week to pass before posting anything on the topic with the hopes that everyone in our circle would be aware of the coming changes by now. I'm really sorry if you are finding this out via my blog.

After 12 wonderful years, we are leaving our current place of ministry. Jon has recently accepted a new position and we will be moving in the Fall. We are so thankful to the Lord for the sweet body of believers we will be joining, and so very thankful for the years of training and guidance we have received here. We have often tried to imagine how different our lives would be if it weren't for the training and experience we received from so many wonderful people. I think every aspect of our lives have been impacted.

I am especially thankful for the friends we have made, friends who have become family.

So as we eagerly look forward to our move -- new church and work, more friends, new community, and all the possibilities we are imagining -- I fully expect a ton of tears before our moving van pulls out. Sometimes, the experience of loss or of change exposes the depth of love and appreciation I have for something or someone. I want to savor each moment, and fully realize just how blessed we have been.

And I am going to "smile at the future."


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