A Morning with Michael

It was a surprise, a complete surprise actually, because Michael is my sleepy-head and slow to get going in the morning. Just like me,  really.

It was still in the six o'clock hour, Jon was buttoning up his shirt and nearly ready to leave for work, and I was sitting up in bed reading while sipping the last bit of coffee Jon had brought up. I could hear Michael rattling around in the kitchen, but I figured he was up early playing with his new little submarine in the kitchen sink. Then he appeared with a handsome but shy grin, carrying the breakfast he had prepared for me.

He handed me a glass of water, and a slice of bread with raspberry jam. He had sliced the bread himself (which I would have discouraged if I had known, but I'm glad he took the initiative nonetheless).

Then, after Jon had kissed us good-bye, Michael joined me under the warmth of the blankets while I savored my breakfast. I had been reading from 1 John 3 about the outworking of love, and together we had a sweet discussion. He ran to get his Bible so that he could read it for himself and underline some verses.

These are the memories that are most precious to me.

Later in the kitchen I discovered he had tried to reach the silver platter on which to deliver my breakfast, and that he had written a little note but forgot it on the counter. Sweet, thoughtful boy.

"We know love by this, that He laid down His life for us; and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren. But whoever has the world's goods, and sees his brother in need and closes his heart against him, how does the love of God abide in him? Little children, let us not love with word or with tongue, but in deed and truth." John 3:16-18

"We love Him because He first loved us." John 4:19

And by way of encouragement...

"This is the confidence which we have before Him, that, if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us. And if we know that He hears us in whatever we ask, we know that we have the requests which we have asked from Him." John 5:14-15

Happy leap day everyone! Too bad it doesn't feel like we're gaining an extra day the same way we gain an extra hour in the fall!

~Katherine

Orange

I came home from running errands with an idea that inspired me to pick up my camera and search for things to photograph. Occasionally I give myself a little assignment to work with, either to consciously look for the things I am thankful for, or simply to focus on a creative theme. It's just for fun, but in the process I hope to learn a little about my camera and take better pictures. This is what motivated me to look for the color orange...

The color orange has grown on me in recent years. Along with brown, orange was a color I disliked as a kid. Maybe that was because orange medicine always tasted worse than the red or purple kinds, and orange lollipops and popsicles reminded me of the awful orange medicine. Not that I really knew what was cool as a kid (ha! still don't), but I don't remember orange being really fashionable either. Orange and brown together seemed especially crusty.

Now I think the color orange can be pretty stunning. It's fresh and vibrant, and it can look amazing with grays and whites and aquamarine. Still, I don't have very much orange to take pictures of, but here's what I came up with.

My idea of "fast food"~ fresh vegetables and fruit that can be eaten on the go. I've learned that if I leave carrots, sliced peppers, sugar snap peas, or any other fresh veggie on the counter in the afternoon or while I make dinner, my kids will easily eat up an extra serving of veggies or two without noticing. Fresh fruit (like clementines) are the perfect treat. Fostering healthy habits has always been important to me, and it makes the occasional sugar-y splurge extra special.

(If you are wondering, I didn't buy three boxes of clementines just for our family!)

Spelling test with Olivia... The color orange was less evident than I had hoped for in this one!

A cup of coffee in the mug Andrew gave me for Christmas...

I nearly forgot I have this orange hoodie. It's actually one of my favorites because it's so soft.

These are shells found on our walk along the beach. Olivia makes a fun partner when I let her in on my "assignments." The shades of orange may be debatable here, but I'm going with it anyway.

The beach. It's going to be my quiet place. I've always thought of myself as more of a "mountain person" than a "beach person" but it is really drawing me in. I bought myself a great big sunhat because I plan on being at the beach often, especially as the weather warms up.

And it is warming up. The fruit trees are beginning to bloom and the scent of jasmine fills the air. In fact, when I arrived too early to pick up Michael from his lessons one day this week, I drove back and forth along the street with all the windows down. The fences lining both sides of the street were draped with jasmine, and the fragrant breeze coming into the car was out of this world. We just had to buy a little jasmine plant at Trader Joe's because all I have at this house are succulents. Oh, and weeds. We're working on that...

I'm really enjoying this time of year here. Everything is greening up and the birds are singing their melodies. What is it they say? "You can take the girl out of the country, but you can't take the country out of the girl." I believe it's true, and I'm super thankful that I can easily get to where it feels rural.

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My verse for the week:

"Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted. Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ."   Galatians 6: 1-2

It is a good parenting verse for me. Any honest mom would admit there is a lot of transgression going on in her home among her little flock. It then becomes our job to seek restoration "in a spirit of gentleness," with true repentance being the desired outcome.

Sometimes, however, evidence of true repentance is lacking and the cycle repeats in no time.

How do I respond? Well, sadly, sometimes I'm already mad because I repeatedly have to deal with the same issues. Sometimes my flesh begins to rise within me when there is no repentance, even after I have  corrected in a spirit of gentleness. Sometimes I forget who the sin was committed against and I begin to act as if I was the victim.

In addition to sinful anger, there can be pride in there too. It's proud to think of others as more sinful than myself because I am made of the same stuff! Furthermore, it's pride that would have me believe I can bring about true change in one's life. Yes, and pride that causes me to be upset by the fact that things are never as lovely as I'd want them to appear.

I need the constant reminder to keep watch on myself, lest I too be tempted.

I need to remember that I am not the one who will bring about true repentance. In all things, I must be humbly dependent on the only One who can reach into our lives and change us. We are all weak, susceptible, sinful, and in desperate need of grace~ His grace.

What hope! I need to remember HOPE! I can give them hope by pointing them to Christ, and in so doing, and by the grace of God, I can come along side them and bear their burdens in love.

~Katherine

Be Mine

I've always kind of snickered at Valentine's Day. I'm slowly warming up to it as I redefine it in my mind, but overall I still think it's kinda corny. "Buy your tacky arrangement of red roses and be romantic!" Um, no. That's not romantic.

It seems to me that the most romantic moments in my life have been simple times without the typical romantic atmosphere. The best kind of romance just happens. It's not forced.

On the other hand, I think there's more than one kind of romance, and a romantic life is not filled with flowers and lace and chocolate. It could be a hard life lived and shared together~ Two people working hard for the same purpose, clinging to each other in the highs and the lows, and fighting passionately for something more.

The best kind of romance is not a moment, but a story.

And if a romantic story is what I want, it will take work. Love doesn't stay in one place: It's either fading or growing stronger. Apathy, neglect, ingratitude, and the like can easily sneak into a relationship when things get comfortable. Relationships can't be taken for granted if they are to thrive or survive. Love takes work, but I believe it can be delightful work. My aim is to increase the ways in which I express affection, and to be purposeful in promoting the health of my marriage and relationships with those I love most.

Well anyway, I'm turning this post into something far beyond what I set out to do! All I really wanted to say is that this year I wanted to celebrate Valentine's despite the cheesiness. I wanted to surprise the kids with a fun little party during the day and then express my love for Jon with a little more romance than usual.

A couple weeks ago when I began planning what I wanted to do with the kids, I was envisioning an outdoor party. However, the weather turned cold and rainy over the weekend and I was forced to come up with something else. While the kids worked on school in the morning, I converted a little corner of the living room into a special little party spot. I wanted to make it special and something they weren't expecting. At one point while things were still coming together, Andrew commented that it looked like I was getting ready to have company over. "It looks so nice! Why are you doing this for us?" he asked. My point exactly. I need to do things more often that say, "Because you're special and I love you." That shouldn't be reserved just for company.

The kids helped me assemble platters of food, and I quickly decorated the cupcakes I had baked the night before. I told the kids to dress in whatever they thought was appropriate for a fancy party. Only one boy needed a little guidance. Not bad.

I was sort of expecting them to gobble up the food and run off (after all, I do have three boys), but we had such a nice time talking while slowly going from one course of treats to the next. No one was in a rush to move on, and it was an easy opportunity to talk about love and relationships. We talked about more serious things in between jokes. It was good for me to assess what they understand, to see an innocence that I want to protect, and to continue to lay the foundation for deeper conversations that will come in time. It was nice and light, yet purposeful.

(During our party the cloudy skies cleared and streams of sunlight poured in. It was lovely... and blinding!)

I think having the food on the coffee table helped to slow down the consumption of it, and prolonged our time together.

(Just love this little munchkin...)

(Olivia's been sick... no more fever, but still so low on energy.)

I asked Michael to take some pictures which included me because, after all, I was there too. He has been expressing an interest in photography, and I'm excited about learning together. The exposures are not quite right, but I'm glad for the memories.

(I love the spot of chocolate on Jack's cheek! Oh, and he's the best kisser of the bunch because he's still five! I do tell my boys that they are never too old to kiss their mother...)

I do hope that my kids will learn to be intentional and creative in the way they express affection. I want them to someday learn to be romantic because they saw it at home. Real romance, not obligatory cheese!

I was left with this lovely mess to quickly clean up before getting ready for my hot date!!

Jon and I have similar feelings regarding V-day, so the fact that he made arrangements for us to go out was unexpected... and a special gift was even more so. I'm thankful for a husband that is so thoughtful and who continues to pursue me years past our wedding day.

We talked and laughed. I don't know, but there was something very freeing about it all. We planned and dreamed as we discussed what we want for the future. We want to live side-by-side, purposeful in what we do, and cling together in the highs and the lows. The hard stuff of life is sometimes the most meaningful, and we want to do it together~ unafraid because we have the Lord. In the end it all seems very romantic to me.

I love you Jon!


~Katherine

V-Day 2012

When all things are completed, love will still endure. While hope and faith will be fulfilled and perfectly realized in heaven, love is everlasting. Love never fails.

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The kids and I just wrapped up a fun little Valentine's Day party we put together here in the corner of our living room. Jon is picking me up in 40 minutes and we're dropping the kids off for the evening! I'm really looking forward to some time with just him...

~Katherine

Miscellany

A little miscellany of memories, reminders, quotes, excerpts, and thoughts in no particular order...


What they said:

Michael: "Sorry Mom, I don't remember any of the 3 times multiplications.... But don't worry because I'll prolly never use those."

Andrew: "I don't want to get married. Well, actually, I kind of do want to get married so that I won't have to do all the work around the house."

Olivia, after being asked if she would have preferred all sisters: "No! If I didn't have brothers I'd have no one to wrestle with!"

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Encourage, encourage, then encourage some more:

I know how much a cheerful word can spur me on, and how sincere encouragement can motivate in a time of weariness. A gentle, uplifting word is a powerful tool that we should frequently use to build up and communicate love to our children.


But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called “today,” that none of you may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin. Hebrews 3:13

Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul. Proverbs 16:24

A good word makes him glad. Proverbs 12:25

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They keep talking:

Jacob: "Was I born when you were a kid?"

On a different day...
Olivia: "Oh! I almost asked you how old you were when you were my age!"

Me: "Andrew, why are you hiding here?"
Andrew: "Because there's a girl out there who is in love with me."

Jacob, to me: "Too bad you have so many pimples. Look: there, there, there, there..."

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I throw out 3 to 6 pairs of jeans per month because the boys wear through their clothes so fast! I've tried so many different brands of jeans, but it makes no difference. I don't think it is very funny because it seems they are always out of a good, hole-less pair of jeans. On the other hand, they did find it very funny when I recently split a pair of my newer jeans. Jon was nice enough to say the jeans must have been defective, but I know well enough to blame the fact that I'm still eating like its the holidays.

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Jacob: "Why do they call it shampoo? Why not shampleaf? Even shamPEE would be better than shamPOO."

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Regarding education:

"I cannot emphasize enough the importance of focusing on the strengths as well as the weaknesses. The goal is to make sure that the strengths and not the weaknesses define the child's life."

Sally Shaywitz, Overcoming Dyslexia, p.93

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Words of Charles Spurgeon:

"By perseverance the snail reached the ark."

“There are times when solitude is better than society, and silence is wiser than speech. We should be better Christians if we were more alone, waiting upon God, and gathering through meditation on His Word spiritual strength for labour in his service. We ought to muse upon the things of God, because we thus get the real nutriment out of them. . . . Why is it that some Christians, although they hear many sermons, make but slow advances in the divine life? Because they neglect their closets, and do not thoughtfully meditate on God's Word. They love the wheat, but they do not grind it; they would have the corn, but they will not go forth into the fields to gather it; the fruit hangs upon the tree, but they will not pluck it; the water flows at their feet, but they will not stoop to drink it. From such folly deliver us, O Lord. . . .”

“A little faith will bring your soul to heaven; a great faith will bring heaven to your soul.”

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Regarding morality vs. obedience:

Obedient people "are those who understand that their relationship with God doesn't depend on their performance for Jesus but on Jesus' performance for them."

"Religious obedience is probably the most difficult and dangerous form of obedience simply because it is so easily confused with conformity to God's law."

"The promises of life and obedience are not meant to build our self-confidence. They're meant to make us long for obedience and then, when we fail again, they're meant to crush us and drive us to Christ."

Give Them Grace, by Elyse Fitzpatrick and Jessica Thompson, p.12, 33, 36

"Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light."  Matt. 11: 28-30

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On the salvation and happiness of our children:

"We were never meant to carry the ultimate responsibility  for anyone's soul: neither our own nor our children's. Only the Good Shepherd is strong enough to carry a soul-- that's his job, not ours. And although this committed parenting appears godly, it is nothing less than works righteousness and idolatry." Give Them Grace, p. 54-55


There is nothing that I can do or say that will ever make my kids "get saved". On the other hand, I can never mess up so badly as to make them turn away. Salvation is always by the power of God. He alone saves and He alone transforms.

What a relief, and, humanly speaking, how terrifying! It all comes down to faith and trust in a good, loving, and just God.

Do I trust Him? Do I actively trust Him? It will be evident in the way I parent my kids.

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Have I ever mentioned just how sweet my husband is? He brings me coffee in bed or up to our bedroom while I'm getting ready nearly every morning. It's one of my favorite parts of the day.

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Jacob: "This is the worse day of my life!"

A stomach bug hit him fast and hard. Thankfully he recovered by the end of the day, and no one else came down with it. I practically quarantined him to my bedroom, and I disinfected everything he came in contact with. After throwing up for the fifth or sixth time, when he wasn't sure he was done, I asked him to wait in the bathroom for a second while I ran downstairs for something. I was back in less than a minute and found him sleeping on the floor. Poor guy. He was the most pitiful patient.

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An observation:

Someone is most likely to have an accident in a bed of freshly changed linens than in a bed that needs to be changed. And though we've been fortunate in that we don't have habitual bed-wetters, if one kid has an accident, another kid is likely to follow the very next night. Strange how that can be.

In contrast, a slice of bread usually falls face up around here.

Example of what I frequently find on my bed:

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Relationship with Husband vs. Children:

Marriage comes before children and is permanent. I am his and he is mine.

Children are not our own. We raise and train them to go out into the world to do and be what God calls them to.  They are our stewardship, and only borrowed for a time. We raise them knowing that we must cheerfully let them go and entrust them to Him.

A husband, on the other hand, will be there long after the kids are gone. Husband and wife are joined together, never to be separated. They are one. If I don't make my relationship with my husband a priority, my children will grow up seeing a family model that is not according to God's desire, and therefore doesn't bring him glory.

If I don't prioritize Jon above my children, I will not be the kind of mother God calls me to be.

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From old sermon notes I found on Philippians 4:13, which says:

"I can do all things through Him who strengthens me."

In context, this verse is about contentment in the midst of trial, difficult circumstances, or adversity.

Contentment is characterized by steadfast faith, accepting God's sovereign control over all things. It is demonstrated by a thankful spirit, a heart of joy and satisfaction.

Why? How? Because by gaining Christ we have everything.

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I caught this grasshopper myself, thinking I'd score a point or two with the boys. They were happy for a little pet, but totally unimpressed by my act of bravery.

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Regarding boys and bathrooms:

My boys are in charge of keeping the bathrooms clean. Well, really, it's mainly my job but they have to wipe down the counter, sink, toilet and floor each day. I've given them a spray bottle with diluted vinegar so they don't have to breathe in chemicals or risk injury if they accidentally spray their eyes (which is likely to happen, you know), and a roll of paper towel. It is my way to bring to their attention just how gross they can be in the bathroom. I figure that if they see the drips they've made, and the globs of toothpaste, then they might be more careful.

I came across a cute sign that said, "My aim is to keep the bathroom clean; Your aim helps." I've thought of posting such a sign to the underside of the toilet lid.

So here's my questions: How do I get them to consistently remember to flush and keep the toilet seat down? Any suggestions? Please?!

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I am pretty much obsessed with bed-head, and boys who cuddle in the morning. I just love it.

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 “Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and you will be saved."

Acts 16:31

Jesus said, "Because I live, you will live also."

John 14:19

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~Katherine