My Baby Doll is 10

It seems so strange that Olivia would be 10 years old today. How could it even be possible? What a fantastic 10 years it has been!

Last night I watched her sleep for a while and she still seemed so small to me. Maybe it's because she was hidden under layers of blankets with her head snuggled into her blue and yellow blankie, but her arms were positioned just the same way as when she was an infant squirming out of her blanket burrito. She still looks so peaceful, so sweet. I could have sat there all night remembering, praying, dreaming.

What a  precious gift she has been to us! My life dramatically changed the morning she was born: I never imagined I could love a tiny little somebody so deeply at the very first sight. My whole world of emotion and affection burst into a much larger universe. I discovered a new kind of love, in addition to a deep vulnerability to pain and suffering.

The birth of this child made me a mother, a role which holds such great meaning and purpose to me. Her arrival changed me forever.

She has been the easiest, most compliant child, and mothering her is a delight and a breathtaking privilege. She has a tender heart and is very perceptive to the needs of others. She is sensitive to the things of the Lord, eagerly seeking to understand. She is sweet and funny and intelligent, and I often feel ill-equiped to guide such a gift.

Yet I know that God chose me for her, and her for me, and I am so thankful.

We had a small party for her today... Just like she wanted it to be. It was a birthday celebration for her and a celebration of God's kindness to me.

I will post some pictures of the day soon...


~Katherine

Our future is not to be feared

Since the Fall there has been tragedy because it's part of the curse. No one has lived untouched, unscarred. Recently, news from around the world has been devastating. There is unimaginable loss, wars, uncertainty, pain, suffering, disaster. Many are confused and gripped by fear and the future looks grim and hopeless.

Yet for those who are in Christ, our outlook is not so because we know that the heavens and the earth are not permitted by God to go its own way.World powers are not permitted to go their own way and neither are the invisible thrones and dominions. Colossians 1: 16-17 says, "For by Him all things were created, both in the heavens and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities-- all things have been created through Him and for Him. He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together."

Sunday I was reminded of these truths and my thoughts were redirected to focus on the things above rather than to fear the future because it is secure in Christ. Such comfort. My life is hidden in Him and I am safe. No matter what happens around me or to this dying body of mine.

2 Peter 3 reminds us to be diligent in readiness for the day of the Lord, and we do this by faith and righteous conduct. Furthermore, in the midst of suffering and of fear which surrounds us, we have the distinct privilege to be light and salt in this very lost world.

...Lord, strengthen me and enable me to live in faith and obedience, with joy and thanksgiving.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We've had some wacky weather here, with more in the forecast. Today, however, was beautiful and green and fresh. The children played outside while I cooked and baked, watching their play from the window. It all seemed so peaceful to me.

Sunday was crazy! The only way for the kids and me to get into our car after church was to walk through water up to my ankles... and I was wearing a 3 1/2 heel! This was traumatic to some of my kids... Olivia was especially worried that the wind would pick her up Mary Poppin style when she held the umbrella while I carried the little boys.

Later, on our way back for the evening service, we had to make a detour because a telephone pole had fallen across the street. Our trip home was even more exciting... cars were stalled in the intersection we crossed because the water was too deep. We watched a man walk from his car in knee-deep water. Thankfully, we made it through just fine in our bigger car. I watched the two pickup trucks in front of me make it through, and I chose to follow rather than back up on a four lane boulevard.

That evening, Jon's plane was the first to land in several hours. I was so glad he didn't stay stuck in the airport, and especially glad to be with him again!

But if that wasn't enough, later in the night a mid-size pine tree came down next to the house. Fortunately, it did not hit any structure and missed the wall by Michael's bed by several feet. Only my rose bushes suffered.

Yesterday we had showers, hail, then sunshine causing steam to rise off the shingles, and then rain once again.

Fun times for people who hardly get weather!

(Riding on a trolly on a beautiful, care-free day...)

"Because Your steadfast love is better than life, my lips will praise you." Psalm 63:3

Katherine

Nerdy Mom...

...or Fun Mom, or Gross Mom, or Weirdo.

Just like Olivia responded to me the other day when I asked if the cream of wheat was thick enough, "It depends on your perspective."

Whatever.

An idea came to me, then an opportunity. Since I have three curious boys and one eager girl who learn well by seeing and touching, I did something for the first time since college.

I set up a lab in the garage, and pulled out these...

...and printed off some guides.

(So take this as a warning before viewing the following pictures!)

We pulled out gloves and tried to look smart...

...but it didn't help that Olivia didn't line up the buttons right on her "lab coat" or that two of the kids were wearing flip flops with socks.

Then we opened our packages of these:

Meet Mrs. Bullfrog. Actually we had four just like her.

Since I didn't let the kids use the scalpel at first (and eventually only the older two), I had my work cut out (pun intended). It was very interesting to see how each child responded to what lay beneath the surface-- not always as I expected. Some really took to it, gently teasing away layers and inspecting each part, while others casually poked and prodded and complained about the smell of formaldehyde. Still, everyone agreed that it was a fun way to do school.

Michael stuck with it the longest. When we finished going through the guide, he used the scalpel to cut through the organs to see what they looked like on the inside. Then he flipped the frog over and made a few cuts to find the skull. 

Jacob went from dissecting to riding his scooter and back again several times over. I suppose it's not usual to do these types of science projects when you're in preschool. I just love the gloves on him!

It wasn't too long and Olivia was doodling on the table covering. What's funny is that Olivia hardly ever doodles during normal school time, while it is harder to keep the boys on track. Things were reversed this time.

One of my favorite classes in college was Human Anatomy and Physiology. I used to spend hours in the lab, totally enthralled by each specimen, my face as close as I could get without going crossed-eyed, and never bothered by the smell. However, by the end of our garage biology lab session, I was feeling like the little guy Olivia drew.

One thing that hasn't changed is that dissecting stuff always makes me hungry. So I suppose that makes me a weirdo after all.


~Katherine

Irish-ness

I don't believe I have any Irish blood in me, but I guess it's possible if checked far enough back. I'm half English, and half French with a little Native Canadian.

But then I went and married me an Irish boy and took on his Irish name. Jon's lineage is all Irish.

And this little bootie reminds me that I have another Irish connection:

Jon and I were on a short term missions trip to Northern Ireland the summer of 2000. We stayed in the country for four weeks, traveling to different areas and assisting churches with their children's outreach programs. Of course everyone had the initial jet lag to get over, but as the rest of our team was feeling better each day, my fatigue was only increasing. I thought the nausea was related to Jon's (crazy) driving along those narrow county roads, in addition to being tired. As various clues began to come together over the course of that first week, Jon and I slipped away one afternoon and bought a pregnancy test.

It was negative.

Two days later, however, another test read positive! We were SO surprised! Even though it was kind of planned, we never expected for it to happen so quickly. It took me weeks to mentally process the news, but in the mean time it was impossible to keep secret. Or to keep anything down.

I remember awkwardly calling our parents from a pay phone, and telling the rest of the team a day or so later. By that time we were moving to another location and it was decided by our contact in that area that I would be billeted in the home of a doctor. For the remainder of out time I lay in bed or hugged the toilet.

I was out of commission for the next 5 months, as was the case to a slightly lesser degree with my subsequent pregnancies.

But the following March - the Irish month - our healthy Olivia was born. I was so in love! I knew right away that I wanted to do it all over again because it was so worth it!

The funny thing is, for the next four or five years I couldn't even listen to someone speak with an Irish accent without feeling nauseous!

So to celebrate our Irish-ness we looked for the color green in our little world, which for today included our yard, Olivia's riding lessons, and a quick stop for some ice cream. And I did it all without feeling nauseous even once!

It was a fun little photographic assignment...

Now if my Irish boy could only hurry up and come home already!


Katherine

Flowers and some take-out

I've always loved flowers. For as long as I can remember, I've always appreciated the first blooms of spring bringing cheer and new life once again. As a kid I would keep my eyes open for the first yellow flowers that grew in the forest when there was still icy mound of snow in the shaded areas and around protruding boulders and such. My mom would tell you that I'd scream in delight when I found that first bloom.

So if you don't enjoy flowers, this post is probably not for you!

I took my camera out Friday afternoon and practiced shooting in manual mode while the kids played. Learning my camera has been a slow process, but also a long-time desire.

It's been wonderful having Jon home again after a super busy week at church. One more good night's sleep and he will be all here! Several times this week my thoughts went back to when he first became involved with the conference. He was working full time, shepherding a group of 300 students, writing his thesis, etc. and I was at home with a four month old and a toddler who was not quite two. Jon was away a lot during that stage of our life, and we were still a new little family trying to find our way. I was lonely. So lonely. There was no family around and most of my friends had moved away because their time at the seminary was over. We had also recently moved, we had one car (and therefore no car for me during the day and many evenings), and my days were long. I felt ill equipped to do it all on my own, especially parent a toddler for the first time.

I know I was often temped to be bitter, to fall into a pit of self-pity. I'm sure at times I succumbed. But overall, I knew I had to grow up and be a loving supporter, often taking on more than I felt I could. Yet I think this is what stretched me and caused me to grow. It was just the way God had established it for me, training me and preparing me for a future I could not understand at that time.

In hindsight, I am thankful for those difficult years. I'm thankful for the growth in my life. So many women I come across need encouragement in this area as well, and God has equipped me to do so with understanding and sincerity. Our loving God never takes us through difficult times without a reason-- that reason always being for His glory and our good. Through it all, I have come to be so thankful for and proud of a hardworking husband.

...And I just love that man and can't wait to hang out with him this week!

(Michael gave me these flowers and I later found that he had placed them in a sundae dish. A sweet idea...)

This past week was a little difficult and we definitely had long days. Parenting was tough. The battle was exhausting. My own failures were evident.

But I am determined to be faithful in my roll as a mom if it kills me! I want to be found faithful to the very end, and I pray that my labor will bare fruit. I pray that by His grace I will persevere regardless of the circumstances, regardless of my tendency to fail. HE is mightier and I am confident that HE will be faithful to His word.

At the same time I am mindful that when correction and reproof is a constant necessity, parents must be extra careful to make opportunity to bless, encourage, and demonstrate affectionate love to their children. That was my goal for Saturday.

I wanted it to be a fun day, removed from situations that don't bring out the best character traits for a while. I tried to say "yes" as much as possible, even if it meant more work for me. I put my projects aside again because my children are more important.

Michael had the idea of setting up a take-out window and I ran with it. This was my view from the dining table.

I took pictures from the inside because it is how I see them for much of the time. In years to come, I want to remember my days as they were.

Jon had come home at this point with left over t-shirts from the conference for our kids. The camo was enough for them to come up with new games to keep them entertained and playing together until dinner. They were good and tired out by bedtime.

"But as for me, my prayer is to You,

Oh Lord, at an acceptable time;

O God, in the greatness of Your lovingkindness,

Answer me with Your saving truth."

Ps. 69: 13

"My soul waits in silence for God only,

For my hope is in Him.

He only is my rock and my salvation,

My stronghold; I shall not be shaken.

On God my salvation and my glory rest;

The rock of my strength, my refuge is in God.

Trust in Him at all times, O people;

Pour out your heart before Him;

God is a refuge for us."

Ps. 62: 5-8

~Katherine